I tease a friend of mine about being a slacker because she doesn't call me back when she says she will and because of her laid-back personality... but I believe I deserve the ultimate slacker award. I have slacked off on this blog to the point that my friends say "oh yeah, I forgot you have a blog!" Totally understandable! Oh and I am the queen of excuses.... "my wrist hurts (impending tendinitis or carpal tunnel, won't know until next month... gotta love socialized medicine AKA Army medicine) too much to type", "I'm too busy teaching Vacation Bible School (a class of 3rd graders... oye!)", " the weather is too hot", (what that has to do with not blogging, I don't know, I just know it's one of my mainstay excuses!), etc... In addition to this, I have this uncertainty in my life that affects all that I do (or rather, don't do). I KNOW it's a year away, but these 2 years here in San Antonio have zoomed past rather quickly. See, I am excited and scared about the future. I have already blogged about how with all 3 of my kids in school this year, now I am supposed to concentrate on me and my goals. Which goals? Which are realistic for an army wife? Which ideas for a career would make me happy? But then there is next summer where everything changes.
Next summer our tour here is up. Now as an Active Duty Reservist, Z (the hubby) can go through a list of open positions for captains of his qualifications and pick a job and if he is accepted, we will PCS (permanent change of station) move there. He has been offered time and time again a position with regular (non-reserves) army by a guy he has seen in the strangest of places and very coincidentally. This post would be in Germany. I have NEVER been off the continental US.... does going to the Florida Keys count? I don't have the knowledge or experience of traveling in other countries or cultures let alone to move to one. I know we would be living on base, but let's face it people, I would never just hang out on base when I would be living in a country that has castles to tour and explore and is surrounded by more countries with castles to tour and explore! But again, it is yet another thing in my life that I have no experience with. So thus the terror and excitement both lodged in my brain!
All I want out of life is to be a better mother to my kids and to have time to spend with my hubby alone... otherwise my mind is open to new experiences. I just wish they weren't hitting all at once! I read about my friends from school with their careers or even going back to school and they all seem like their goals are so clear cut! Then I read about my mommy friends (on facebook, where else?) whose preschoolers are moving on to elementary school, like mine, and who are going back to careers they had prior to children, or are going back to school for new ones. How is it that I am so lackluster about career listings? I love reading... maybe I should be a book editor? How does one go about getting this job? I love history... should I teach it? Write about it? If I teach it, what age do I teach it to? I have no patience with attitude problems in kids... mine or other people's... just ask the kids from the bible study I volunteered in last school year. I was known as "the mean lady" because I wouldn't let them disrespect their teachers in front of me and I demanded the use of manners as well. My Dad wants me to go into nursing. I know a lot of people in nursing or in school for becoming a nurse. My Dad wants this because it is a field that is desperate for people, they are giving good hiring bonuses and he says I have the compassion for it. OK, so which kind of nursing? Hospice? Pediatrics? Hospital? ER?
I think my biggest issue is that nothing jumps out at me. So decisions, decisions....